Towards Freedom

Today, Easter Sunday, we are celebrating life with our real Easter Bunny named Emma. It was just about one year ago on a cold and rainy day I decided to venture off into a rough part of town to check on a dog who seemed to be neglected. While driving in a downpour I asked myself why on earth I was going into a rough neighborhood to pretend to be interested in getting a dog that I had no intention of adopting. Several times I attempted to turn back, but the car seemed to have a mind of its own and kept pushing onward toward our destination. Upon arriving I was greeted by a large and disgruntled woman who led me into her tiny backyard. She brought the dog to me who was frantic from lack of exercise and kept running in circles around me. I noticed a group of small boxes and inquired as to what they were. Mary, the woman, told me that they contained rabbits. I asked her to lift up the wooden doors so that I could see them and I was shocked to see rabbits of all different breeds in tiny wire cages with no amenities whatsoever. One in particular was cowering and shaking staring at me with a plea for help. When I told Mary that I saw no food, water or bedding and was concerned of the rabbits trembling, she said they would get a few pellets and some water at the end of the day. I asked why they had no bedding or hay and her response was they were breeders not pets. When she shut the door to the cages I felt sick that once again they were in the dark and cold in complete isolation. I drove home and did not sleep for 2 nights as I could not get the vision of these terrified rabbits out of my head. Finally I called Mary and asked if I could adopt the little gray bunny who was trembling so. She yelled that she was a breeder and paid good money for her. I offered her more than she paid and picked her up the next day. I felt guilty as though I was supporting a mill, but I had to save this precious little rabbit. Having never had a rabbit before, I didn't know exactly what she needed, but after looking on line had everything ready for her when she arrived at her new home. We had her spayed, litter trained her and she now sleeps on a soft bed compared to wire, has full run of the house and is a companion to our dogs and cats. She has not been in a cage since after the first week we brought her home. She lives life to the fullest and entertains us daily with her ballet leaps and spins and her hilarious antics. She was 2 years old when she came to live with us and her past life has finally vanished. She is no longer timid or anxious and greets us every morning with love and joy. So today we say Happy Easter to our dear little Emma who will live out her life free of oppression and dominance and will continue to be the bunny she was meant to be.

While meditating, a picture of my sister, Maryann, flashed across my gaze. Maryann had fallen from a car going 60 mph when she was 4 years old. As a result of the accident she became brain-damaged and her eyes crossed. She was in a coma for 31 days and had to learn to walk and speak all over again. She was a constant source of anguish to my parents, who decided she would be the scapegoat for all of their problems. She rarely attended school and by the 8th grade she was expelled never to return to any formal education or home schooling. She began to drink a lot of alcohol at an early age which progressed to any and every type of drug. She was in and out of mental institutions as well as prison cells. She was the eldest child of seven and abused all of her younger siblings both physically and mentally. Just the same I loved her. None of my brothers or sisters shared my feelings for Maryann. As a matter of fact when she died, we were asked at her burial if anyone would like to say anything to her before she was lowered into the ground. My brothers shook their heads no, while my twin sister said that since she was unable to love Maryann in life that maybe God could love her for her. I said that I loved Maryann and would miss her terribly as she was very dear to me, then broke down sobbing. Why did I love this sister who had been cruel to me in so many ways especially when I did well or excelled in form of art, music, dance, academics or athletics?

When I was 12 years of age, a nun, named Sister Thea, had our entire classroom scribble a design onto a sheet of construction paper then find an object within the design from which to make a landscape. In my design, I had found a slipper that was gently sweeping among a forest floor of leaves. I drew and colored each leaf on my sheet of paper in brilliant autumn colors. The slipper took on a deep rich crimson red. Sister Thea loved my drawing, stating hands down I had taken first place in art class. I had a choice of icons as a prize and chose my favorite (as a child) which was the Infant of Prague. I ran all the way home from school in anticipation of showing my parents my drawing and statue. Upon arriving home the first person to see my picture was Maryann. I was so excited to show it to her and tell her how I had won first place and received a statue that I couldn't contain my joy. Maryann became extremely agitated while holding my drawing in her hands and proceeded to rip my picture into hundreds of scraps. I was in disbelief and while crying began to crawl on the floor desperately trying to gather the pieces in hopes of putting it back together for my parents to see. As a child I didn't grasp how anyone could be so cruel, as an adult I realized how jealous and inferior Maryann felt and that any achievement of mine was an affront to her.

As we children matured, I continued to love Maryann and of all 7 children I was the only one she cared about and wanted to be with. She was a wonderful aunt to my children and they adored her. She had a certain child-like innocence and was able to impart a lot of her gifts to my children that adults were not privy to. I became to understand Maryann by watching her interact with my kids. When my children got older she lost all interest in them, but she and I remained close. About a month before she died, at the age of 49, she had asked me if she started to drink carrot juice and eat vegetarian as I did would she ever look like me. From all her years of drinking and drug abuse her face had become mottled and puffy and her tiny frame was bloated. I told her she was already beautiful, but a healthy diet would definitely enhance her beauty. The day before she died she called to tell me that she had her first glass of carrot juice and was having salad and veggies for dinner. Before I began meditating this morning I was thinking of how I no longer have a relationship with any of my living siblings except my brother Kevin. Kevin who is deaf and blind in one eye and labeled mentally retarded is also a vegetarian due to my influence. I felt a little sad at the loss of ties to my other siblings, but at once recalled a statement a very wise soul had said to me: "It's alright to wait for someone as long as we don't wait with them." As I thought of that statement I felt peaceful and decided to meditate. While meditating Maryann's face flashed before me and I realized if she were alive today she would join Kevin and myself in the Animal Rights Movement. I wonder why it is that of all of my brothers and sisters only the 2 who were brain injured were able to see the unethical and immoral use of animals for food, while the others choose to turn a blind eye and deaf ear to such abuse.

Today, Sunday January 20, 2008 I awoke at 5AM to begin making all sorts of vegan delights for 7 hours of football viewing. Seldom do we watch any television, but today is an exception. My brother Kevin will be here for most of the day to watch The Green Bay Packers in a championship play off game, which we will hopefully win so that we can proceed to the Super bowl. Brett Favre, who is probably the most well known quarter back around, was going to retire last year, but in the hopes of acquiring Randy Moss, a wide receiver from Minnesota he decided to stick around for another year. He signed a contract for this year and alas we didn't accept Moss, most likely because of his mooning our fans at Lambeau Field a couple of years ago. Favre was beside himself, but begrudgingly began another season with mostly rookies. Lo and Behold for the love of Brett the rookies aspired to play as well as many seasoned veterans. So here we are playing today to advance to the Super Bowl.

Yesterday, while shopping at a major supermarket, I kept noticing obese women with shopping carts filled from top to bottom with every type of meat. One woman had sausage, bacon, hot dogs, chicken, bologna, pot roast, spare ribs, and pork chops in her cart; these were just the animals that I had a chance to observe, there may have been more mangled corpses. I seldom shop anywhere other than our Natural Outpost, but I needed a few items that this store carries for a lesser price and it is located nearby. As I walked down aisles jam packed with people with over flowing baskets of meat and junk food, I had almost an uncontrollable urge to start talking animal rights. I wanted to interview people and ask them if they had any idea of how the meat they were purchasing arrived to the store all neatly wrapped in plastic. I thought I should tell them of the suffering of animals, the impact on the environment, and the devastating affect eating meat has on their health. There were also many women wearing fur coats and fur items. Are these women aware of the suffering of animals for their vanity? As an animal activist do I have to wait for an appropriate time to present itself for me to inform people of the horrors of factory farming and slaughterhouses? How can I stand by and watch people fill their bags, carts and bellies with unimaginable suffering and say nothing? Do we as animals activists need a platform to plead our case for those without voices?

Every Monday morning I look forward to stopping at BreadSmith, our local bakery, on my way to work. Walking into the aroma of fresh baked bread and hearing the laughter and chatter of the employees has always been a welcomed joy for me. Today, however proved to be a rather negative experience. All of the employees know that I am vegan so they offer me samples of vegan breads as well as muffins or scones. A woman whom I like quite a bit offered me a new type of bread that had chips in it stating how delicious it was. Another employee jumped into the conversation telling me that they weren't non-dairy chips so I would most likely not want to sample the bread. I thanked her and then she asked me specifically what the difference was between a vegetarian and a vegan. As I proceeded to explain the difference to her the manager walked out onto the floor and spoke loudly as she was exiting "Are we talking about vegetarianism again"? Then she said "Well I'm a proud carnivore". I had so many thoughts run through my mind I didn't know how to respond so I said "just what part of the suffering of animals makes you most proud"? Her response "All of it"! She then left the store as a coward would normally do. I wanted to tell her that she should go vegan for 30 days to try to lose the extra 100 pounds she carries around and if she didn't feel better we would gladly refund her misery, but she was gone and I was left feeling sick at the encounter.